Ranma's hands gripped the railing of her balcony in sheer annoyance. With every additional thought as to how Ayumi and his rivals were ruining her dream of playing Juliet in the play _Romeo and Juliet_, her grip tightened. Only when the wood began to buckle underneath her fingers did she realize how close she was coming to destroying an important part of the scenery. At least the spotlights weren't trained on the balcony or her at the moment. Instead, they were trained on center stage... on Ayumi, who was presently grousing for anyone who wanted to hear about the very idea that someone believed he should kiss Ranma. "I won't kiss her! Never! This isn't a part of the play!" Of course, the audience knew better. "Yes, it is!" someone shouted amidst a growing field of jeers. "The 'love scene' in _Romeo and Juliet_ is famous!" Ayumi refused to listen. Ranma growled, softly enough for only her to hear. She'd expected him to do just that, however. Nonetheless, she had steadfastly refused to forego her dream of playing the role of Juliet simply because the four most likely to bring the play to a screeching halt were each clamoring to be her Romeo for one personal reason or another. And, despite the fact that Ayumi held little interest in this play and obviously hadn't bothered to memorize a fair amount of his lines, he still remained the best choice out of all four would-be Romeos. Kunou and Happosai both had their own reasons for trying to be close to her... reasons which made Ranma want to stay far away from them. As for Gosunkugi Hikaru, Ranma supposed he *was* harmless enough - but he did unnerve her, somewhat. There was also his use of weird disguises, such as the time he had actually pretended to be her, school uniform and all; Ranma had never officially forgiven him for that. The frown which had taken shape on her lips now deepened. More and more of late, she felt as though whatever tiny fragments of control she had left over her life were rapidly disappearing. That, in turn, fueled her anger. She knew this play wasn't that different from her life - not with many people out to get her for one reason or another, and her often being unable to do much about it. Fortunately for her, events hadn't built to a point where she'd want to take her own life as Juliet had, Ranma mused. And the first person who started drawing parallels between Ayumi and Romeo in her presence would be pounded into the floorboards. Another glance down at the stage revealed that Ayumi was still fretting over the concept of kissing her. Hadn't the idiot ever heard of a 'stage kiss?' He didn't *really* have to kiss her, no matter what their fathers believed! The two men would try just about anything to make the marriage they envisioned between her and Ayumi become reality... Destiny's Wish Part Thirty-Three: A Kiss To End It All written by Mike Koos ---------------------- Ayumi suddenly became aware of the sound of laughter approaching him from behind, growing in intensity and volume as it did so. He spun on one heel to find that his three rival 'actors' were steadily edging closer. Kunou folded his arms. "It was obvious to all that your performance tonight would be as flat as this stage we tread upon, Tendo Ayumi!" he announced in the haughty tone which wasn't that far removed from his normal manner of speaking. Ayumi opened his mouth to reply, but Happosai spoke first. "You don't even know what you are doing, and are unprepared to take advantage of an opportunity to steal a kiss from Ranma..." He latched his pipe around the inside of one of Ayumi's wrists, flipping the young man off-stage. "You make me sick, you false Romeo!" "What do you think you're doing!? I'M the *real* Romeo!" Ayumi yelled in mid-spiral. Ranma shot him a glare he could practically feel before he passed the edge of the curtain, then pivoted to face her would-be suitors on-stage. "I hope you three don't think anyone's going to kiss me except the *true* Romeo!" she told them, turning her face away from everyone so that no one could see her fighting the beginning of a round of tears. Ayumi sharply withdrew his breath. Did Ranma *want* him to kiss her? He recalled the last time he had attempted that... A girl by the name of Shiratori Azusa had kissed him; a meaningless, confusing kiss which also happened to be Ayumi's first kiss. Humiliated, he'd taken a seat by himself in the middle of the dojo, and Ranma joined him not too long after that. After a while, they had come dangerously close to kissing, twice... and only Ayumi's reluctant decision that if they were going to kiss, it should be a kiss they truly meant - and the fact that everyone else in the house had been eavesdropping on them at that exact moment - prevented them from actually going too far beyond the thought of kissing each other. But even then, Ranma had worn what he'd assumed was an expression of slight disappointment. So perhaps a part of her *did* want him to kiss her. The problem with that, though, was that the audience and their fathers would take a kiss between them as a sign that Tendo Ayumi and Saotome Ranma really did love one another and were well on their way to being married. As if quite a lot of people didn't already believe that, now. In the meantime, Kunou, Happosai and Hikaru had each found their way onto Ranma's balcony and were attempting to 'console' her, or so it appeared to the audience. "Poor Juliet," Kunou soothed, wasting no time in wrapping an arm around the girl and placing a hand on her shoulder. "For that false Romeo to render you so distraught..." Happosai grinned. "Cheer up! You shouldn't be upset when our love scene is right around the corner!" he enthused. Before Hikaru could work up the courage to say anything, Ranma sent all three Romeos flying across the stage by way of a single, forceful punch. "LEAVE ME ALONE!" Backstage, Ayumi continued thinking about the situation at hand, not having moved from the spot where he'd landed - on his head. He folded his arms and muttered, "Damn idiots." Honestly, the other three were only here because of Ranma. So was he, in a sense. Take Ranma out of the picture, and what reason would they have to participate? Other than trying to show him up, of course. His father and Mr. Saotome had insisted he be here, under the pretense of being there for Ranma when she needed him... *not* so that he could drool over the stupid tomboy. "Oh, the sorrow felt by our beautiful heroine, Juliet," Kabuki - in his role as narrator - announced over the sound system, hoping that he could give the audience the impression that the crew *hadn't* lost control over the play at large... whatever control they'd had over the play to start with. "...as she waits for the return of her one and only true love." The audience resumed their low murmur. Most of them had come in hope of seeing the much-publicized kissing scene between Romeo and Juliet - and since Ranma was undeniably playing Juliet, everyone assumed her Romeo was Ayumi. Ayumi righted himself. This wasn't a matter of whether or not he would kiss Ranma, he thought. Pride, yes, but it had gone beyond Ranma's little dream. He had to prove to the three morons that he could out-fight, out-think *and* out-act them - as individuals, or as a group. Oh, he'd definitely show them... "This can't be easy on Ranma," Sayuri shook her head in disgust. "Can you believe that?" she asked her sister, who sat beside her in the audience. "She's up there trying to play Juliet the way she's supposed to, and Ayumi and those three idiots are turning this into... into... whatever mess they're turning this into!" Sayuri growled. She was almost inclined to make her way backstage and yell at all four of the 'Romeo Crew' in Ranma's place. Yuka nodded. They knew Ranma well enough that they could recognize the signs of her distress or anger from a distance, even when she wasn't facing them. Ranma was trying her best not to break character, but much more of this lunacy and she would lose her temper. She was straining to keep her infamous temper from exploding now... What Ranma needed was encouragement. Yuka stood. "Ganbatte, Ranma!" she called to her friend. "Don't let them get to you!" Soon others in the audience were adding their own encouragement and cheers. Ranma scanned the audience until her eyes found Yuka. she thought, then gathered her determination. She noticed Kunou running across the stage toward her balcony. Ranma threw her arms wide. "Romeo-sama!" Kunou's expression brightened considerably. "Oh! How fortunate for both of us that you finally remember who I am, my Juliet!" When he had come close enough to embrace her, Ranma shot a hand forward, grabbing what she could of the elaborate costume he wore and heaving the Kendo swordsman over the heads of the audience. "You are NOT my true Romeo!" In the next instant, she looked up and found that a large cargo net was about to envelop her. A cry of surprise rose from the audience. Happosai quickly wrapped the net around the cursed girl and, with a leap, carried her from the balcony to the stage. "Now, it's time we were married!" he cackled, too caught up in the fantasies of what he *truly* planned to do with Ranma to recognize that his captive was barely struggling. He was enjoying his role, really; Ranma - an innocent, beautiful and young Juliet, so pouty-lipped and full of feminine spirit - had no choice. She would follow the rules of her character, becoming his in the end. And she would be, too. "Oh, dear!" Kabuki spoke into his microphone as the martial-arts master reached the end of the stage. "What a tragedy! Our heroine has just been abducted by an evil demon!" Happosai set his bundle down long enough to run off-stage and bring the weighted end of his smoking pipe down on the young man's head. "Who do you think you're calling an 'evil demon,' boy!?" That done, he dashed back onto the stage. Hopefully, Ranma hadn't had enough time to break free of the net. She was a considerable martial artist, yet nowhere in his league... though if she were determined, as she usually was, freeing herself wouldn't take her much time at all. Fortunately for him, she apparently had not. As he moved to pick up the bundle, a hand burst forth from the netting, grabbing him and lifting him off his feet. Juliet emerged from the net, bringing him up to her face so that she could meet his gaze. "Niihao, Romeo-sama!" she smiled. "Huh?" Happosai was puzzled. This was Juliet, dressed in the exact same costume and wearing her long hair exactly as Ranma had worn hers, but... this was *not* Ranma. Given his refined senses for many things female, this imposter could *not* expect to trick him into believing she was Ranma. Shampoo smiled. It was practically impossible to go anywhere in the district without hearing something about a diminutive old pervert stealing lingerie and groping every girl he could find; once she had hear that the 'pervert' was seen most often near the grounds of the Tendo Dojo, a slight bit of surveillance helped her determine the truth. Nearly everything she'd heard about the man was true, the twisted lot of it. Somehow, he had talked everyone at the Tendo home into letting him live there, and now spent a portion of each day tormenting them - especially Ayumi and Ranma. Shampoo felt a touch of sympathy for Ranma. Being the only girl in the house meant that the pervert would target her more often than any other family member. But the fact that he was causing problems for Ayumi angered Shampoo most of all. Regardless of what debatable skill this 'Happosai' had as a fighter, there was no way a pervert would get the better of her! She had come prepared, having learned what the man's apparent weaknesses were. Getting close to Ayumi would be a problem if she didn't get the other Romeos and one Juliet out of the way, first. She'd bound and gagged Ranma backstage, then carefully concealed several bottles of hard liquor within her own costume's dress. The extra weight - along with the glass bottles - made moving about harder, though Shampoo hadn't planned on leaving the bottles there for long. Shampoo reached for one, using the thumb of the same hand to pull out the cork before she shoved the open end of the bottle into Happosai's mouth. Soon, he was finishing off every bottle she handed him without any prompting. "Why, Juliet-chan," he slurred ever so slightly, "you always know what I want." She frowned and placed another bottle within his hands. "Very impressive, Romeo-sama!" Time for the final lure. Shampoo slowly drew out the extra bra she'd worn over her regular bra. The pervert's eyes widened; she knew this was the kind of thing he truly wanted. Great-great grandmother wouldn't approve, but one needed drastic measures to take out this particular pervert. She dangled the garment before Happosai's face, using it to lead him into the barrel of sake she had hidden behind the curtain at the end of the stage. Once she'd had him trapped within the barrel, she promptly nailed it shut and began tying a thick rope around it as many times as she could. So much for *this* pervert... now all she had to do was ship him off to some obscure part of the world. A pair of arms wrapped around her, catching her tightly in a near-choking embrace. "Oh, Juliet!!" the owner of those arms exclaimed. Shampoo recognized the voice. It was the Kunou boy, a Kendo swordsman who was deliriously in love with Ranma even though Ranma had no love for him. Did Ranma feel sorry for him? she wondered, reminded for a fleeting second of her own 'relationship' with Mousse. No matter how many times or how often she told Mousse she didn't love him, he continued chasing her - occasionally beating up anyone who dared show interest in her. The same could have been said of Ranma and Kunou. Why was it that whenever she convinced herself she had little at all in common with Ranma, something new appeared to contradict that thought? Ranma was her rival. Not a friend, though they might have been good friends had events played differently. Thinking about the possibilities had kept Shampoo up late one night or three. The idea of wondering what one simple change would mean to the 'universe' she'd known was difficult to resist. What if Ranma had remained in her village, become a member of the 'warrior tribe' alongside her? Ranma did have potential; great-great grandmother had admitted that. The Saotome girl deserved a measure of respect even if she wasn't a part of their village. But as for these *boys* who insisted on chasing them and harassing any other boy who happened to show them even a slight measure of consideration... Shampoo's anger rose once more. This Kunou boy was reminding her more and more of Mousse. She'd done a bit of checking into Kunou as well as Happosai - the Gosunkugi boy wasn't much of a threat, in her opinion - and found that he apparently liked bossing the entire school around, not just Ranma or Ayumi. One of those people who thought that a weapon gave him uncontestable power over everyone else. She had also watched Ranma pretend to tolerate the boy's advances backstage, before the play began. Everyone thought that she was Ranma, now, which meant that the lovesick delusional fool would be after her. That, she couldn't have. Shampoo extended a foot backward into Kunou's midsection, not particularly caring where her foot landed. The only part of the blow that mattered was whether or not Kunou was sent reeling away from her. "Fancy meeting *you* here, Romeo-sama!" She was mimicking Ranma's voice. All her efforts would go to waste if everyone recognized she wasn't the original Juliet... at least, not until she had shared a kiss with Ayumi. *That* would show Ranma she did not have a chance in winning Ayumi's heart... Kunou rebounded from the edge of the stage. Spotting one of the open bottles of liquor, he snatched it on his flight back to his Juliet - and before she knew it, he was forcing her to drink from the bottle. Her eyes widened as she involuntarily swallowed. She'd never been much for drinking alcohol, and that was an embarrassing fact she knew too well. But while her cheeks began to flush, Shampoo knew it was beyond her control. Oh, she'd get him for this... Assuming she remembered this instance later. A yell cut through the confused murmurs of the audience. One of the teachers' aides assigned to keep an eye on the Drama Club was striding through the center aisle toward the stage. "Stop this play! There is to be NO drinking of alcoholic beverages on school grounds!" Reaching the stage, the aide leveled the Kendo practice sword he carried for disciplinary purposes directly at Kunou. It had taken some time for the news of this violation to reach him, but once he'd been told that the actors were actually daring to drink *real* alcohol on-stage... he knew he had to act fast. "If you do not want to be suspended, young man, you will--" The words died in his throat as Kunou effortlessly diced his bamboo sword into several pieces with the aid of an actual katana. This was Kunou's attempt at copying the move Ranma's mother had previously used against him; what better way to prepare for an opponent using such tactics than learning to execute a similar move, himself? "I do not see any alcohol here. Do you?" Kunou brought the blade of the katana even closer to the man's face. "Leave! You are disrupting this play!" "Er... r-right," the aide nervously stammered, edging away in retreat. "Carry on." If anything, the distraction had given all the alcohol Shampoo had swallowed time to have an effect on her. Having pulled herself upright, she drunkenly swayed forward a few steps. This wasn't right... her balance was off. She made herself stand straight, hiccuping once or twice along the way. Kunou returned his attention to her, sword held ready as if he thought it improved his image. "My life means nothing if I cannot spend it in your embrace, fair Juliet," he improvised. Hardly anyone was going by the script any longer, anyway. Plus, if Ranma realized that he was speaking directly to her as well as her character... Juliet giggled. "Er... okay, why not, Romeo-sama?" Shampoo asked, forgetting that she should be disguising her voice. Her odd behavior did not go unnoticed by Kunou or the audience. "You!" Kunou took a step forward. That had not been the angelic voice of his pig-tailed goddess! Had someone dared take her place? "How dare you mock me! Who are you?" When she didn't answer, he charged her with a quick sword slash. Ranma could easily avoid such an attack; if this Juliet was *not* her but some fool stealing her appearance for evil purposes... well, it would be her loss. Shampoo let him come close, then turned and gave him a solid back-kick, connecting with Kunou's chin... before passing out. The audience applauded. Anyone who could get the better of Kunou deserved the applause. Kunou rose from where he had landed, several feet from the fallen Juliet, and studied her. The girl was sprawled out upon the stage, her condition somewhere between unconsciousness and sleep, snoring loudly. "J-Juliet...," he stammered. Could he have been mistaken? Perhaps Ranma was proving the range of her skill as an actor by playing hard-to-get. Certainly, no one but his pig-tailed goddess would have the courage or skill to dare striking him... He dropped to one knee, carefully scooping her into his arms. "Juliet... let us prove our undying love for one another with a kiss..." Someone tapped the point of a prop sword against his cheek before his lips could touch hers. "That is *NOT* the real Juliet!" Anger, undeniable spirit and beauty, all vying for control of a single voice. There was no mistaking that voice! Kunou's gaze followed the length of the sword to the hand that held it, then to the face of the girl who dared wield a sword against a fighter as skilled as he. "I believe *I* am the one you want," Ranma insisted. It was her, speaking words he'd previously only heard her say in his dreams and fantasies! And here he was, preparing to kiss an evil doppelganger... "Oh, Juliet! Please forgive me! I did not know this was but a mere shadow of your true beauty." Ranma barely withheld her scowl. She was understandably angry; first the Romeo quartet had turned the play into a competition over her, and now Shampoo had joined the fray as well, holding Ranma captive backstage so that she could pretend to be Juliet. Well, Ranma thought, if she had to reclaim this play from Shampoo and the loon squad, so be it! She shook her head slightly, making the large braid of false hair concealing her smaller braided pigtail sway an inch or three. "You must pay for your infidelity," Ranma declared, striking a fencer's pose. "Come!" Kunou did. "Fair enough! I shall redeem myself by letting you prove your desire to share my heart!" Saying nothing, Ranma lunged. Had the original Juliet as written had any experience with a sword? she wondered as Kunou proceeded to parry each of her strikes, her tin sword making an odd clanging sound when it struck Kunou's steel katana. Sword-fighting wasn't one of her established skills - not yet, anyway. She had been training in Kendo, and one day, her mother had announced that she would pass down the family katana to Ranma. Nodoka, unlike her, was quite skilled at using an actual sword. That thought had inspired Ranma to try harder in mastering the use of a sword. Dad had insisted countless times that it was better to learn unarmed combat. That was true; if you depended only upon a weapon in a fight, you would find yourself at a tremendous disadvantage whenever an opponent disarmed you. But had her father also said that to steer her away from being able to use her mallet and mother's katana against him? Kunou was also more skilled than she at using a sword. He was also somewhat prone to being fooled. Ranma grit her teeth, pretending to have difficulty keeping up with Kunou's attacks. If she could make him believe she had less skill or endurance when it came to swordfighting, he would eventually make a mistake that she could exploit. "Ah, you are quite skilled with a sword, my dear," Kunou gave her a tight smile. "But none in this world can hope to compete with my skill!" As if proving his boast, he dashed under Ranma's next strike and placed his hands firmly on her shoulders to keep her from moving. "We mustn't be fighting, Juliet. The scene of our passionate kiss is long overdue." Ranma brought up a clenched fist underneath his range of vision. Hopefully, the audience wouldn't see it, either. Oh, she'd give him something to kiss... She never had the chance. Ayumi dropped out of the rafters onto Kunou's head, sending the other crashing to the floor. "What do you think you're doing?" Ranma hissed in a low voice. "I was about to--" "About to what? Don't tell me you *want* to do the 'love scene' with Kunou," Ayumi said from his perch on Kunou's head, making 'quote marks' in the air with his fingers to emphasize the words. The blush rose in Ranma's cheeks. "N-no! Of course not!" "Oh, really?" Ayumi turned away from her, hopping off the Kendo swordsman's head. "What are you so afraid of? Here, I'll show you how it's done." He walked over to Shampoo, who was busy deciding if she should wake up for a few more minutes or simply sleep off the rest of the alcohol, center stage. Taking the fallen girl into his embrace, Ayumi pressed his lips to hers and bent her backward, making a rather obvious show of kissing her. The audience collectively gasped as a whole. They had hoped Ayumi would kiss someone - but *Ranma*, not a girl whom most of them did not know. Shampoo decided that she was still fairly drunk, hallucinating, and quietly passed out again. Ayumi promptly carried her limp form off-stage. Unseen by Ranma nor the audience, he had fitted a piece of duct tape over Shampoo's mouth before pretending to kiss her. No doubt Shampoo was here to be with him; he was in enough trouble over her kissing him as it was. Once Ayumi was certain that no one could see them, he wrapped Shampoo up from neck to toe with the rest of the duct tape and hid her behind one of the wardrobe racks. Now, to get back on stage, and get on with the play. "Juliet!" Ayumi called, striding toward her. She had turned her back to him. He had to admit, she'd done a great job of staying in character all this time. Then, once he was close enough, he could see that she had her head lowered, and fists raised. Ranma was trembling - or perhaps quivering in anger; he wasn't sure which. "So that's it," she said. Ayumi blinked. "Huh?" "You've really only wanted Shampoo all this time, and you've been playing with my emotions." She spun about to face him. Ki flared into her hand, fueled by her anger, though she didn't notice this until she had thrown Ayumi all the way across the stage with a single slap. "WELL, I HOPE YOU TWO WILL BE HAPPY!" Ranma stared at her hand in wide-eyed surprise. She had been trying for a while to develop her own ki-based special techniques, without much luck... and now, she knew she had used her ki in an attack without thinking about it at all. Could that be part of the way to adapt her ki for use in her techniques? Not to give it much thought? Ah, well - she could think about it on the way home. "I'm going home," she told Ayumi, not caring whether or not he could hear her from the other end of the stage. "You can stay here with your beloved Shampoo." "Can it be?" Kabuki despaired from his announcer's post off-stage. Certainly, no one among the members of the Drama Club had seen *this* coming when they recruited Ranma and Ayumi. "Are our star-crossed lovers through with each other, forever?" Once backstage, Ranma yanked the false braid of long hair from her head. "That's it! I'm through!" she snorted. Ayumi pushed his way through the curtains leading to the stage. "What are YOU so angry about?" he demanded. The tomboy could be set off by the most ridiculous things, sometimes. From her words, she had misinterpreted the dual purpose of his act with Shampoo - a quite painful misinterpretation, from the way she had slapped him. The makeup crew would probably have to cover up the mark left behind. When had she learned to boost the power of her slap like that? Her only response was to stick out her tongue at him. "We're so close to the ending!" lamented Kabuki, turning off the microphone so that no one would hear his words. "*So* close! I thought we could make it before the whole play fell apart around us..." "You stupid tomboy! I didn't do that with Shampoo because I love her or anything," Ayumi near-shouted, sprinting to catch Ranma before she left the backstage area. "Leave me alone!" "I put some tape over her mouth and *pretended* to kiss her!" he persisted. She ignored him. "Whatever." They were heading for the backstage exit, Ayumi saw - which, thankfully was near the clothes rack behind which he'd hidden Shampoo. He dashed ahead of her and pulled Shampoo's happily unconscious form out for Ranma to see, pointing to the tape covering the girl's mouth. "Here, see? Told you." He could see indecision play for a second across her face as he turned to look at her - and something else. Gosunkugi was creeping from behind another rack of clothes toward Ranma! The boy slipped a cloth over Ranma's mouth and tried to keep it there. "H-how about some *chloroform*, my love?" both Ranma and Ayumi wondered at almost the same time. Ranma's anger surged when she thought about the person using chloroform on her in the first place. She wrenched the cloth from her mouth, using her other hand to grab the pale boy's head and shove him to the floor. "WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?" A blissful smile crossed Hikaru's lips. Ranma felt her eyes grow heavy. The drug was having an effect on her after all. She fought against it... but the chloroform had had too much of a head start. With a sigh, she collapsed into Hikaru's waiting arms. As Ayumi watched, Hikaru brought the edge of a dagger against Ranma's neck. "Keep away from us, Tendo! Unless you want to see her hurt!" he laughed. "Gosunkugi...," Ayumi warned. Hikaru stared for a moment at the gentle beauty and innocence the sleeping girl's face held. He couldn't truly hurt her, could he? Of course not. But as long as Ayumi didn't realize that, everything would be fine. Now, for the getaway. "Come, my Juliet," he said. All he had to do was carry her away, and... "We must flee this place, quickly." If only he hadn't underestimated his strength in carrying an unconscious Ranma away. She wasn't heavy - rather, he simply wasn't strong enough to hold her entire body within his arms. The best he could manage, straining, was to drag her along the floor by her shoulders. Ayumi rolled his eyes. The guy was completely pathetic! It would take Gosunkugi forever to get Ranma anywhere, even outside the auditorium. Still, Ayumi figured he had better teach Gosunkugi the lesson the guy had coming. Ranma would have, had Gosunkugi not drugged her. A second later, Kunou burst forth from the racks to snatch Ranma from Hikaru and send both him and Ayumi tumbling into the props stacked nearby. "*Juliet*--!!" He carried her back onto the stage, feeling her chest fall and rise with every breath as he held her closely to him. "Forgive me, Juliet, but we must continue the play if we are to share a kiss..." Ayumi kicked Kunou in the face and retrieved Ranma from the swordsman's embrace. "C'mon, wake up!" he urged her. "We've gotta get this play over with and go home!" The sooner, the better. The sensible choice would be to get her out of here and take her home, but he knew Ranma would probably be upset if she couldn't finish the play. He was aware of Kabuki's voice, making another announcement. Oh, right - they *were* back on the stage. Ranma lay limp, draped in an undignified position within his arms. He shifted her to a more comfortable position. "Will our fair heroine ever wake from her deep slumber?" ** ** ** Applause masked the sound of the curtain sliding open for the final scene. The crew had taken care to lay the sleeping Ranma upon a bed of flowers within an open-air glass coffin at center-stage. "As the fair Juliet continues to sleep," Kabuki read from a script, "waiting for the only one who can awaken her with a kiss--" "Isn't that from _Sleeping Beauty_?" Sayuri asked her sister. "I think so," answered Yuka. What, was Ranma now a princess under a spell in addition to being Juliet? "...her Romeo--" Kabuki's voice came to a strangled halt as Ayumi lifted him off the ground by the folds of his robe. "And just WHEN did this become a part of the script?" Kabuki shrugged, pointing toward a pair of men - or rather, a man and a panda - who were watching them from director's chairs stationed nearby, stern expressions to their faces. Ayumi frowned. Thank goodness he'd tied Kunou, Happosai and Gosunkugi in a not-so-neat bundle and deposited them next to Shampoo, at the least. With any luck they wouldn't cause any problems until the end of the play. "Who said you two could make changes to the script?" he growled. It was just like them to make such a change! The original script had nothing about him needing to kiss Ranma to wake her up; he knew that much. Playing dead would have saved him from having to worry about what the audience thought of his acting. Soun stood, looming over him. "There's no time to lose, Ayumi. You must get out there, now!" Next to him, the panda offered his agreement. "Why should I?" From her place on-stage, Ranma kept her eyes shut, despite what she could hear of the argument taking place backstage. she realized. The effects of the chloroform hadn't worn off until the curtain was already opening, and Ranma had taken her cue from the applause and Kabuki's announcement. Why were their fathers so desperate to have them kiss, in front of everyone? They didn't care at all that they were ruining a dream of hers... Unfortunately, there wasn't much she could do about that here and now. "Your honor is riding on this, son!" she heard Soun tell Ayumi. It was? Since when? "And so is Ranma's. Are you willing to destroy her dreams while the entire school watches?" Ranma suppressed a snort at that thought. "I'm *not* going out there!" Ayumi yelled. The two fathers grabbed him, heaving him onto the stage with all of their strength. "Of course you are, Ayumi! Show me and everyone out there that you actually have *some* backbone for once in your life!" Ayumi latched onto the only thing available to halt his flight across the stage - the side of Ranma's coffin. He came to a stop inches from Ranma's face, then quickly drew back once he realized how close he was to her lips. The lights dimmed, save for one spotlight that was soon trained on both of them. For a full three minutes he stood in place, half-hiding from the audience and half-peering over the rim of the coffin at them. Each person waiting, wanting to know whether or not he would kiss her. Would they turn into an angry mob if he didn't? Ranma lay before him, unconcerned. Why should she be? he wondered. There was no one pressuring *her* to kiss him, here. Whether she was awake or not, the audience would probably side with her, no matter what happened. Their stares were each directed at him. Him, and no one else. Not even Ranma. Her friends were in that audience somewhere, too; Ayumi recalled hearing Yuka lead a wave of encouragement for Ranma earlier in the play. Maybe they would be among the first in line to come after him when the mob formed. Ayumi told himself. Gritting his teeth, he gripped Ranma's shoulders and stared nervously down at her face. Everyone was expecting a kiss. But could he do it? Could he kiss her? If he did, the play would be over - but everyone's opinion of his relationship with the sex-changing tomboy freak would be changed. He moved closer to her, a foot from her lips, now... and froze. "Come on, hurry up!" his father urged from the sidelines. "We don't want to be here all night!" "Leave me alone!" Ayumi hissed in return. Already, it felt as if his cheeks were a full shade of red, what with all the blood surging into or through them. What did *Ranma* think about the idea of having to kiss him? Would she have agreed to be a part of this kissing lunacy if she hadn't been drugged and playing the role of Juliet? Probably not. If only she were awake now... Kunou burst through the line his father and Mr. Saotome had formed, having broken free of Ayumi's duct-tape bonds. "Such is your downfall, you false Romeo! The *real* Romeo, none other than myself, would never hesitate to kiss--" Ayumi's left hook sent Kunou cartwheeling back into the wings. "We've already settled this, *remember*?" "Hmmmmmm...," Soun frowned. "I think Ayumi needs further persuasion." He had developed a technique, based on the technique his Honored Master used which could project an image of himself twenty times larger than normal, that projected a large image of only his head. It worked quite well for making people see his point, particularly when he was angry. Genma had learned Happosai's version of the projection technique... but not Soun's version, which required far less amounts of ki and could be executed with fewer risks. He used the technique to project a giant representation of his head above and behind Ayumi. "Why don't you kiss her? Do you not love her?" his projection boomed, eyebrows furrowing in anger. In the audience, one of Naka's friends gave him a sidelong glance. "Naka? Isn't that your Dad up there?" Naka shook his head. "Nope; just a bunch of special effects." "Hey!" Ayumi argued with his father. "Will you quit trying to force me to kiss her?" Lowering his voice to a level which his father and the audience couldn't hear, he added, "I haven't decided whether or not I... if I... l-love her." Ranma's eyes opened wide. She hesitantly extended a hand, resting it atop Ayumi's fingers. "Ayumi...," she whispered, somewhat urgently. Ayumi started, then bent closer to her. "Y-y-you... you're awake?" And she had heard, too... "You want to get this over with, right?" she asked him, shutting her eyes. "Come on, kiss me." He backed away from her. "I... I can't! You don't understand!" "Please, Ayumi-kun? Won't you do this...... for me?" Ranma pleaded. Ayumi found himself leaning even closer. Peering into her eyes, following the soft outline of her features... She pulled him close to her, her hands on his cheeks, and they kissed. The audience erupted into cheers, catcalls and applause. Banners unfurled amidst a sudden storm of confetti, proclaiming a love between a boy and a girl that would never be destroyed. Ayumi withdrew from the kiss. "So, what do you think?" Ranma grinned, sticking her tongue out at him again. She had used precisely the same trick he had used when kissing Shampoo - a wide strap of duct tape now completely covered Ayumi's mouth. "Did you like my performance?" He could only mumble a few words and hope that Ranma wouldn't be able to discern what they were. ** ** ** It was mid-evening by the time Ranma and Ayumi had changed into their 'street clothes' - their school uniforms, rather - and started on their way home. Ranma walked with an energetic spring in her step, carrying her clothes bag behind her back and humming a song she had heard while out at the arcade with Sayuri and Yuka. She looked up at Ayumi, who was walking on the top of the chain-link fence bordering a drainage ditch, all to keep his distance from her. "Gonna sulk all the way home, huh?" "Just shut up," snorted Ayumi. Residue from the tape she'd used still coated his mouth; no amount of soap had succeeded in cleaning all of the stuff from his face. he turned his gaze away from her, spitting out more of the blasted glue. She continued to smile, raising a finger to her mouth in apparent thought. "I'm sorry. What do you say we try that kiss again - this time without the tape?" Ayumi lost his footing on the fence and nearly fell into the drainage ditch. Ranma blinked, watching him cling to the fence in a frantic effort not to fall. "Sheesh, it was just a joke. You really are easily fooled, you know that?" "You are SO not cute!" She shrugged. "Ask me if I care." ------------ Credits: Written by: Mike Koos Pre-readers: Richard Beaubien, Kevin D. Hammel, Jonathan Ng, Tom Williams With apologies to Takahashi Rumiko... All parts of this series are available at the RAAC archives at ftp://ftp.cs.ubc.ca/pub/archive/anime-fan-works or from my WWW pages at http://www.fanfic.net/~makoto/ Comments and questions welcome. * Mike ('Kino Makoto') Koos: makoto@cal.net * http://www.fanfic.net/~makoto * * "I can do nothing to stop you. Your background music is too strong * for me." - Sam Johnson, Whose Line is it Anyway?